


5 Times Jim Cried for No Reason and 1 Time He Had a Good One

by Daiya_Darko



Category: Star Trek: Alternate Original Series (Movies)
Genre: 5 Times, Angst and Humor, M/M, Tarsus IV
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-07-02
Updated: 2013-07-02
Packaged: 2017-12-16 21:08:31
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,348
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/866625
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Daiya_Darko/pseuds/Daiya_Darko
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Jim cries a lot all of a sudden and know one really knows why.</p>
            </blockquote>





	5 Times Jim Cried for No Reason and 1 Time He Had a Good One

**Author's Note:**

  * For [readbetweenthelions](https://archiveofourown.org/users/readbetweenthelions/gifts).
  * Inspired by [The Times Jim and Bones Showed Their Affection By Way of Too Much Testosterone](https://archiveofourown.org/works/866691) by [readbetweenthelions](https://archiveofourown.org/users/readbetweenthelions/pseuds/readbetweenthelions). 



**5**

The bridge hummed and beeped with a quiet efficiency just before the day could start. Everyone chatted quietly among themselves, catching up on ship news and crew gossip until a loud curse came from the captain's dais.

Jim's face was scrunched tight in pain as he sucked in sharp, short breaths. He hobbled around to collapse in his chair, and gripped the arms tight as he squeezed his eyes shut. Then, slowly but surely, a single tear slid out as he gasped for breath, quickly drawing it right back in with a shuddery inhale.

"Captain, will you be alright?" Spock asked from a display panel.

"I think I broke my toe," Jim grumbled through gritted teeth. "Alert medical."

Another two tears fell down his cheeks as he tried to maintain his composure, but by the time McCoy arrived, he was shaking and pouting, eyes red and lip swollen from biting it. McCoy took one look at him and rolled his eyes. "Same toe, wasn't it?"

As McCoy helped him hobble to the turbolift, Jim could be heard asking if he'd get a lollipop this time.

 

**4**

It was all Jim's fault, and there was no way of convincing Sulu otherwise.

If Jim wanted to try his masculinity, if he wanted to start something, then Sulu would make sure he would finish it.

The sparring rules were simple enough: no direct hits to the head or below the belt, no weapons. Of course, that only applied if both participants were going to observe the rules. Sulu was not a cheater by nature, but when Jim took a crapshot at his gooch, he couldn't help but retaliate with a sharp elbow to the jaw.

Jim stumbled back and fell to the mat, clutching his injured face. He stared in shock at Sulu for a moment, and Sulu was sure he would face official reprimand. Then, an amazing thing happened.

Jim began crying.

It was slow at first, clearly trying to hide the fact that it was happening, but then the tears spilled forth faster than Jim could get a steady breath. Sulu didn't know whether to be worried or laugh, so he went to the comm panel and paged sickbay.

"Gym to medical, Sulu here," he called. 

"Sparring accident?" It was one of the nurses, not McCoy who would know what to do.

"Uh, you might wanna send McCoy for this one."

"Listen here," McCoy's voice suddenly cut in. "Tell him to quit getting himself into fights if he can't handle them!"

Jim is across the room and shoving Sulu to the side to yell back into the comm about his fragile jaw and Sulu takes the opportunity to sneak out and avoid further awkwardness.

 

**3**

Everyone knew Jim Kirk was intelligent; his aptitude tests were off the charts, and there was no way he could get as far in Starfleet as he had without his brains. 

Jim's intellect was not surprising - his love for late 19th century poetry was what caught everyone off guard.

Chekov normally struggled in conversation to pronounce his consonants correctly, but he had been practicing this poem in particular for over a month to help. During a lull in work on a milk run, the bridge crew casually began talking about their favorite authors. Jim had prodded Chekov especially, expecting to hear a love for Karl Marx or Animal Farm, either one honestly, and was surprised when he Chekov responded, "Sarah Williams."

"Who?"

"Reach me down, my Tycho Brahe," Chekov began, and if you ask Sulu, that's where it all went to shit.

Jim's eyes grew wide as saucers as Chekov recited effortlessly "The Old Astronomer" until his eyes were glistening with tears. He balled his fists and brought one to his mouth to gnaw on his knuckle as he listened, overcome with emotion.

"Though my soul may set in darkness, it will rise in perfect light," Chekov said, "I have loved the stars too fondly to be fearful of the night."

Everyone clapped appreciatively, even Jim, who openly sobbed as he did.

"That was so beautiful," Jim's voice warbled. "You have a beautiful voice. Everything is so beautiful," Jim hunched over in tears, and everyone looked helplessly to each other for what to do. Uhura rolled her eyes and could be heard muttering, "Bridge to medical, Kirk's on his period."

 

**2**

Jim ate lightning fast, practically scraping at his bowl of oatmeal until it was nearly clean.

"You'll get indigestion," McCoy warned, scowling over his cup of coffee.

"I just gotta..." Jim shrugged and offered a lopsided smile. "Sometimes it feels like it's not gonna last, you know?"

McCoy frowned, but said nothing. Then Spock said, "You speak as if you have been through an ordeal. Usually the only people who eat quickly are those in prison, those in poverty, or those who experienced some other form of trauma where - "

"Dammit Spock, it's breakfast!" McCoy snapped. "It's too early for that depressing shit!"

Jim's smile faltered. "I'm sorry, was my eating bothering you Spock? Because I didn't mean to make anyone uncomfortable." Jim dragged his hands across his face as he sucked in a shaky breath. "I'm just so hungry lately and I don't know why," Jim began crying silent, slow tears, and McCoy reached over to wipe at them with a handkerchief from his pocket.

"If I did not know better, I would suspect you were pregnant, captain," Spock said, and McCoy nearly threw his hot coffee on the Vulcan.

 

**1**

As Jim helped oversee the transfer of materials and supplies to the colonists of Persephone II, he felt a wave of warmth sweep over him. It wasn't a physical heat, but something from within that made him have to pause and catch his breath.

Off in the distance, he could hear children screaming with laughter as they played. Nearer, his crew was interacting with the colonists, passing along news from home and occasionally flirting. He smiled at the young ensigns and lieutenants, eager to see someone aside from each other for once. Everything felt good, just right, perfectly normal.

Still, something about the scene clutched in his gut, and Jim found himself stumbling into a wooded expanse to be alone for a few minutes.

As the tears slid down his face, he realized why all this felt too good and too familiar, why his emotions were a wreck lately.

 

**+1**

"Okay Jim, spit it out. You've cried at least once a day for the past week. You've been eating your weight in food, and you don't look like you've been sleeping well. I know you don't have a uterus, so what's going on?"

McCoy folded his arms as he sat up against the bed, waiting for Jim to either join him or answer the question. He'd take either as opposed to silent pacing.

"Tomorrow is the anniversary of Tarsus IV, Bones," Jim said quietly, still pacing. "I just - everything makes me think of it. I worry for those colonists; what if they go through what I went through? What if those kids -"

McCoy is up in a heartbeat, holding Jim still and shushing him with soft noises and a hand in his hair. If he had known, he would have handled this from the get go.

"Jim, calm down. You're not on Tarsus IV, okay?" McCoy tilted Jim's head up to look him in the eye, but Jim's eyes were shut as the tears fell forth. "Jim, please look at me."

Slowly, Jim opened his eyes and looked at McCoy.

"Where are you?"

Hiccuping, Jim answered, "The Enterprise."

"And is Kodos here?"

"No."

"Then calm down, sweetheart," McCoy kissed his forehead. "You're safe."

And Jim was. He was standing in McCoy's quarters on a ship that he was in control of. His crew consisted of people who had seen their captain cry over dumb poems and none had laughed. No one berated him or teased him for his tears and odd behavior.

Yes, Jim Kirk was finally safe, and for the first time in years, he was able to believe it.


End file.
